Archive for the ‘Duding Stories’ Category

I'm on a river! Never thought I'd see the day...big blue watery way.

There are few things in the world that are more Dudely besides heading out into the wilderness for a weekend with nothing but your balls, beers, booze, and ambition to get completely annihilated with your friends. If you are brave enough to take on a country excursion then heed some words of wisdom from your friendly Dudes.  

Recently the Bohemian Dude and 10 of his Compadudes headed to the Shenandoah River Valley to camp, fish, play poker, cornhole, and bring the DDO to a whole new level. We set up camp right next to the river; most of the dudes brought tents but some were adventurous enough to bring tent cots and hammocks. The weather was perfect, 75 and clear skies. After setting up camp we started a fire, threw some dogs and burgers on the grill and cracked some brew dogs to start it off. Not only is it necessary to bring an obscene amount of beers and hard liquor, camping also is kin to its organic friends, so make sure you have plenty. 

After a few rounds of drinking corn hole; losers take 2 shots and winners take 1, each round the losers drink the difference of the score. We all decided it was time to get in the river, not only to relieve our bladders, but to float and relax in the cool current. Now the river provides not only cool, crisp refreshment, but also serves as a source of nourishment. If you run out of water stuck out in the woods, you can boil some river water and treat it with a water treatment program, again found at your local outdoor store. There’s also plenty of wildlife in the water, fish, crayfish, mollusks, etc. Make sure you bring a fishing rod and some bait, or it’ll be a long weekend of berries and the runs!  

Once the night falls, break out the flashlights and lanterns so that you can play cards and other drinking games until the fire is out and you’re seeing triple. After you’ve taken all your friends money in a drunken haze, it’s either time to shoot off some guns (potato guns in this case) and cause a bunch of ruckus until you all pass out. It’s pretty routine to fuck with the wildlife at night, just be careful you know how to handle the primal retaliation that may come with it!  

Dudemandude…hopefully this has inspired you to get in touch with your dude roots and get out in the wild blue yonder with your compadudes to get completely destroyed. You never know what nature may throw your way, but at least you know you can DUDE with the best of them! 

Girl: Hey my eyes are up here.

Dude: Yea I know I’m just prolonging my lifespan, thanks.

So browsing the internet I found a study, which came out last year, confirming what I’ve saying for years! A recent article in the New England Journal of Medicine supports the idea that staring at women’s breasts prolongs your lifespan, possibly by four or five years!!!! Now I’m the first to tout the benefits of staring at boobs but this is on a whole new level. Researchers claim that staring at boobs causes sexual excitement, which improves blood circulation and can eventually cut the risk of heart attack and stroke in half! Read the rest of this entry »

Dr. Waka Flocka Flame D.D.S

Dudemandude.net has official photograph evidence that Waka Flocka Flame aka Juaquin Malphurs (pictured above) does in fact go “HARD IN THE PAINT”. Read the rest of this entry »

The Sasquatch Dude

I know this is a looong time coming but I finally had the balls to write it. So I’d like to begin this week’s post by defending my honor. According to the Renaissance Dude in his NY post, I drive like an old woman. This is simply not true, I own a very dudely Xterra that I have equipped with all-terrain tires and a brush guard which keep me from driving obnoxious speeds on the NJ Turnpike. But whatever man The Foreign Dude doesn’t get offended or complain. The rest of the Dude-York story is true, I did vomit a KFC stacker.

And back to my post… At the end of May, I had the opportunity to get drunk and listen to cool tunes with a giant ApeMan and we became friends and he’ll be posting on here as the Sasquatch Dude. We have officially initiated him as one of the dudes. He loves beef, Harry and the Hendersons, camping and facebook. Wait, no that never happened. Sorry, I’ve consumed a couple Magic Hats and my memory is a little fuzzy. I didn’t really hang out with Sasquatch, which I admit would be really dudely, but I did have the opportunity to go to Sasquatch! Music Festival from Friday May 29 until Monday May 31st at a venue called The Gorge in Washington State. It was a ridiculous occasion filled with drinking games, mosh pits, west coast brews, Canadians and good music. Read the rest of this entry »

(Sponsored by JG Wentworth – 877-Cash-Now)

Dude-York, Dude York

Thats right…

We took our Duding to the City that Never Sleeps… unfortunately Jay-Z wasn’t there to slip us an Ambien. Sorry to disappoint, no spit in this Dude-trip —just some dippers.  Read on to see what I’m talking about. Read the rest of this entry »

We here at Dudemandude.net would like to officially announce that WE EFFING DID IT!!! WE DID IT!!! THAT’S RIGHT, WE… DID… IT.

WE DID IT!!! WHOOOOOO!

Did what you ask?
umm… ?

"Let the flashing begin!" shouted Gaspar quite provocatively

Dudemandude has been travelling all over the United Dudes of America, spreading the dudlage to near and far. A most recent journey took us to Tampa, Florida where we found the mecca of Pirating on the eastern seaboard…a fun little annual bashio called “Gasparilla”. Read the rest of this entry »

What do spit and the City of Brotherly Love have to do with Duding? Keep Reading

Dudemandude.net took our 24-hour dude-show on the road to Philadelphia for a change of scenery….and the hope for a Geno’s Cheesesteak.  As we zipped up 95 on our way to our Dude-stination with a case of Bud Ice ($14.99 – Beat that!), I thought to myself – “This is gonna be dece trip!  What could go wrong?” Read the rest of this entry »